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Love Humor: Chick Flicks as Couples Therapy

February 12, 2014 Posted by L.L. Barkat

when harry met sally funny love poems

[on a scale from wit to whimsy: Tongue in Cheek]

Sometimes a serious article is just too good to pass up for humorous opportunity. So it was for the fated Movie Date Night Can Double as Therapy, which Maureen Doallas read in the New York Times.

Says the article, “A fascinating new study shows that sappy relationship movies made in Hollywood can actually help strengthen relationships in the real world.”

Sappy relationship movies, supposedly strengthening relationships, can also make grist for real love humor poems.

Reel to Real: Study in Contrasts

He never wanted to be with me
at a chick flick. And I have to say,

I had some opinions on bromances
myself. So, we shook hands, agreed

It’s Complicated, this trying to bond
over the other’s rotten taste. I can

see Terms of Endearment any time;
he can meet the guys for Superbad.

If I had to watch that, I told him,
I’d just wanna go to the rooftops

and scream. Later, I dutifully noted
in my old Notebook that I’d hoped

he’d get over his love of Swingers.
If I can give up Steel Magnolias,

the least he can do is not replay
Shaun of the Dead. We could make

a Love Story all our own, I hinted.
He wouldn’t take that bait, even

after I showed him the University
of Rochester
study about the role

of relationship movies being just
as effective as any couples therapy.

Neither of us would have to be in
a control group. He sniffed, claimed

he’d rather be Sleepless in Seattle
than discuss the implications

of Date Night or the highs and lows
of When Harry Met Sally. Still, he

didn’t laugh when he said he might
imagine me in She’s Having My Baby.

Me, Working Girl, that I am? He’s either
Clueless or snarfed too much Mystic Pizza.

Poem by Maureen Doallas.

4

Filed Under: Funny, Funny Love Poems, Funny poems, Love, Tongue-in-Cheek, Uncategorized

Funny Cat Books: I Could Pee on This

February 4, 2014 Posted by Glynn Young

Funny-Poems-Cat-Poems-Cute-Cat-1

This is a reprint from an article by Glynn Young, originally published at Tweetspeak Poetry.

***

It’s rather startling: a recurring line in poetry that reads “I could pee on that.”

Charles Bukowski, perhaps? Sandra Bernhard waxing softly poetic?

Nope. A cat.

I Could Pee on This

Her new sweater doesn’t smell of me
I could pee on that
She’s gone out for the day and
left her laptop on the counter
I could pee on that
Her new boyfriend just pushed
my head away
I could pee on him
She’s ignoring me ignoring her
I could pee everywhere
She’s making up for it
by putting me on her lap
I could pee on this
I could pee on this

That’s the title poem of I Could Pee on This: And Other Poems by Cats by Francesco Marciuliano. You may have heard of him; when he’s not recording poems by cats, he’s co-authoring the comic strip Sally Forth. Marciuliano writes the strip; Craig Macintosh draws it. The strip has no cats; those are saved for this book.

Growing up, I was a dog person. My family always seemed to have one, usually mixed breeds. We never had a cat.

I could pee on thisMy wife and I were married four months and living in Texas when our first cat came on the scene, a kitten huddled under a bush near the mailboxes of our apartment complex. No one else was around. I put up signs saying she was found. The signs were torn down. After the kitten became an adult, a friend charitably described her as looking like a silver polishing cloth. She also had the personality of a silver polishing cloth.

Every poem in I Could Pee on This is true.

Our cat lived until she was almost 18 years old. She was one sturdy silver polishing cloth.

A few years after her death, a black cat (a male) wandered into the neighborhood. The neighborhood children, including our youngest son, took pity and fed the cat milk and potato chips. A late cold snap promised to drive temperatures below zero, and my wife took pity. She allowed the cat to spend the night in our garage.

Thank you, my wife. To a homeless cat, that’s a sign of immediate adoption. The cat was so grateful that he left my wife a present on the doorstep – a headless bunny.

The cat moved in.

The only poetry book about cats I’ve previously been aware of was T.S. Eliot’s Old Possum’s Books of Practical Cats, which inspired the musical Cats. But Eliot wrote those poems. There’s no question that the poems of I Could Pee on This were written by cats.

Published in 2012, it’s a laugh-out-loud collection. The poems are divided into four sections: family, work, play, and existence. Which means they are mostly about sleeping.

It’s 8 a.m. and time to rest
It’s 10 a.m. and time to relax
It’s noon and time for repose
It’s 3 p.m. and time for shut-eye
It’s 6 p.m. and time for siesta
It’s 9 p.m. and time to slumber
It’s midnight and time to snooze
It’s 4 a.m. and time to hang upside down
from your bedroom ceiling, screaming

This is a tell-it-like-it-truly-is collection of poems about cats and by cats. At the end of the month, Marciuliano is publishing I Could Chew on This – poems by dogs. At least there will be some balance.

Except with cats, no such thing as balance exists. Even a book like I Could Take You to the Taxidermist: And Other Poems by Cat Owners still wouldn’t be sufficient to counter cats.

Cats rule. And they know it.

Photo by pedrosimoes7, Creative Commons, via Flickr.

3

Filed Under: Featured, Funny, Funny Animals, Funny Books, Funny cat pictures, Funny cat poems, Funny poems

Funny Infographics: Quatrain Wreck

January 18, 2014 Posted by L.L. Barkat

[on a scale of wit to whimsy: Tongue-in-Cheek]

There is one teeny indelicate word on this snarky-funny infographic that teaches you how to write (or not) a sonnet: The Art of a Quatrain Wreck.

Consider the teeny indelicate word to be poetic license. Then take some license of your own and maybe write a Blue Marble sonnet. We’d love to read it.

Funny Sonnet Infographic

***

(see more funny infographics at Tweetspeak Poetry)

3

Filed Under: Featured, Funny poems, Funny Teaching Resources

Funny Chickens Poetry Reading

January 16, 2014 Posted by L.L. Barkat

chicken poetry reading funny poems

[on a scale from wit to whimsy: Funny]

We have a thing for chickens over at Tweetspeak Poetry. How could we not? Just look at the way they write such brilliant poetry.

Funny chickens comic by Doug Savage. HT: Elizabeth Marshall.

***
Check out the Top 10 Funny Poems at Tweetspeak Poetry

5

Filed Under: Chicken Poems, Comics, Featured, Funny, Funny Chickens, Funny poems, Funny Teaching Resources

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